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BySteve Tobak . (Flickr user malczyk)

(MoneyWatch) The whole problem with advice on how to deal with boss issues is it's usually black and white. That's because writing without a distinct point of view is usually very boring. In social media terms, that means it's not very "clickable."



Unfortunately, the working world isn't black and white. Not even a little. It's gray. Lots and lots of shades of gray. It's so gray, in fact, that those clickable viewpoints or hard-and-fast rules aren't even right more than half the time. You might just as well take any advice, flip it around and do the opposite, for all it's worth. No kidding.

For example, these days it's popular to say that employees should be able to argue with their boss without fear of sanction. That engaged and empowered workers are effective workers. That people should be free to speak their minds. That managers should be emotionally intelligent, or at least have emotions.

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That's all well and good in theory. But in reality, there are also things like organizational structure, management strategy, chains of command, roles and responsibilities, power and authority, and all that. And for whatever reason, most managers and executives take that stuff very seriously. Go figure.

The truth is that the word "should" has limited use in the business world. What managers should do and what they choose to do are often two very different things. Not only that, but all too often, should is in the eye of the beholder. It's subjective. It's gray.

Ironically, I'm guilty of the whole black and white point of view thing myself. I'm fond of saying that, if you go head-to-head with your boss, you'll lose. And even though that's mostly true, it still doesn't mean you shouldn't disagree, argue or constructively confront your boss when the situation calls for it.


After all, every situation is unique. To help you navigate that gray world we affectionately refer to as the workplace, here are 10 rules for arguing with the boss and winning or, with any luck, at least not losing your job:

It's got to be about business. One thing's for sure: The argument had better be about real business, and you'd better be able to show how it ties in to something your boss cares about, like results. If it's about anything else, like how she runs the group or whether the coffee should be from Starbucks or Costco, forget it.

You'd better be right. If you're really going up against the boss-almighty, you'd better be right. If you're not sure, don't be a fool and act like you are. That's just plain self-destructive, or at least dumb. If you're relatively sure you've got something worth fighting for, then take your time, get your ducks in a row, be as diplomatic as you can and calmly present your argument. Who knows, maybe you'll win.

Make sure it's your responsibility. Managers are always getting confused about whether it's okay to usurp their employee's responsibilities and trump their decisions. Sure, they can do it if they want, but if they don't have a very good reason, it'll likely backfire. It's just bad management. As far as I'm concerned, if it's your responsibility, then you own it, for better or worse.

Don't second-guess decisions that are hers to make. When it's your responsibility, your boss should let you make the call. Likewise, when it's her responsibility, you've got to be willing to state your case and then just walk away and abide by her decision.

http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-50...g=nl.e664&s_cid=e664
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